PORN MOM
Porn Mom
This was going to be the follow-up video to “Punkin Lovin'” and “Christmas Cunnilingus”. Sean Geer and I even shot some footage with porn star Tabitha Stevens (as the Porn Mom) and singer-songwriter Lucy Walsh as the daughter. Sadly, that footage is lost.
I think “Porn Mom” is the best of the three Shmushkin “singles”. It captures the late 1970’s James Taylor vibe perfectly. Not quite yacht rock but it’s in the marina. Good job Willie Wisely!
This is another one I initially pitched to Andy Dick. He turned it down because he said the line about anal sex in the second verse was too vulgar. He later started performing the song in his live act, changing that line, and claiming we wrote the song together. I had to explain to him that changing my lines after the fact doesn’t make him a co-writer. Somewhere in all this disrespect is an epic compliment.
Lyrics
PORN MOM
‘Scuse me, scuse me, miss?
I don’t wanna creep you out or anything
but…
There was this porno film
that I once saw
when I was a kid
I don’t recall the title
but in this film
there was a girl
who looked a lot like you
Y’know she coulda been your mother
But that was so long ago
You probably wouldn’t even know
You probably weren’t even born
when your mom was in porn
If your mom was in porn
it was probably before you were born
but anyway…
In this film
the chick who coulda been your mother
She got the sweetest expression on her face
when she was getting it in the ass
Now I was just kid and I found it scary
I’m oh so glad she was there she
somehow made it alright
so I’m wonderin’ tonight
if your mom is the one
who made butt sex look fun
But that was so long ago
You probably wouldn’t even know
You probably weren’t even born
when your mom was in porn
If your mom was in porn
it was probably before you were born…
Credits
Written by Andy Shmushkin & Andras Jones
Produced by Willie Wisely
Performed by Andy Shmsuhkin, Andras Jones & Willie Wisely
Purchase
$1.50